Someday you’re going to grow into an independent and powerful woman who seizes the scepter and confirms she rules the world. Or at least you’ll become one who rules your own world.
You might have thought your place would eventually be on the sidelines cheering on a man, but you were wrong. It’s okay, that happens to all of us occasionally. You’re not just a cheerleader. (and yes, it’s fine to be your partner’s #1 cheerleader – in fact that’s part of being in a relationship, but that won’t be the only thing to define you.)
It may take some time as you continue to grow smarter and stronger, but eventually you’ll come to a place where the you of your past is completely forgiven, and you’ll feel a shiver of excitement about the woman you will be in the future. And when you’re equally ready to let go of both the past “you” and the future, you’ll discover it’s a prime space to become the queen of your entire universe.
Girl, it’s been a long and difficult path so far. Yet when you’ve fallen down (and my, have you fallen… with scraped knees and chipped teeth and all the cursed broken hearts you can count), each time you’ve stumbled back onto your feet. And every day goes by that you’re still breathing proves that those battles of the past were nothing. No longer.
It’s been a scary ride, with crime scenes and sharp pains, and things that go bump in the night. Hopefully it’s not you running into furniture after waking up about nightmares of filthy public bathrooms because you have to pee again for the second time that night. But even if that’s you, even after you were woken up every single night for 43 days in a row by children vomiting or crying out because of their own monsters, you still survived it.
You still survived missing trash days, getting a ticket for being out too late past curfew… you’ve survived lettuce recalls and long conversations with Jose Cuervo… killer clowns at Halloween and sociopathic ex-boyfriends. You’ve made it through all of those things – maybe more, maybe less, and yet here you are… hair mussed and yet you’re ready to rock and roll because there’s no other way to be and you can’t imagine not doing it.
And that, my dear, is precisely how you’ll qualify to be queen.
Because after all of that nonsense, here you are, carrying on as though maybe no one else will do it and so therefore you are gonna have to pull those big girl britches up higher and just handle shit. No one else will, and so therefore, you will.
I see you.
And I’ve been there, too.
And in case you didn’t think you already knew this about yourself, just in case you figured you weren’t good enough or brave enough or smart enough or goddammit tall enough, here’s the memo you maybe forgot to write for yourself:
You’re enough. And all those scars and bruises will either go away or stand there to remind you of just how tough you are now. And capable.
Here’s the receipt maybe no one else has written for you – even though you really don’t need a receipt, and you certainly don’t need someone else to write it for you: you’ve paid whatever price was necessary and now it’s time for you to figure out how to collect on the fortunes. You are enough, as you are. Without changing who and how you are.
There’s no original sin you’re stuck paying. Only your student loans, and no one ever gets out of those. But that doesn’t define you. Your debts in collection don’t define you. The times you had to invite yourself to your family’s so you could eat don’t define you. What defines you is that today, right now, you can smile at the morning’s chaos and recognize that for once you didn’t let it ruin your day.
Yes, queen, here you are, bright and capable and breathing like a champ. But maybe you should quit smoking after all, and don’t give me the line about it being so hard. Nothing is hard, and you’ve been through harder. You’re the boss, ma’am, and this is your creation. You are the artist. The god. The maker of tomorrow.
And here we are. Wandering the streets of our communities, laughing over all the possibilities. And while you keep stubbing your toes because you keep looking down, look up. This isn’t all there is and you’re ready to make it what it could be.
When you think you’re doing it all alone, which you are, look up. Because I’m here, too, doing it all alone next to you. And that’s why we’re queens, and I’m where you’re going to be one day. But first, you have to hold this stick of gold that tells everyone who you are.
And while we’re chatting… what will the world lose if you don’t speak up?
So it is.
If you liked this post, and are ready to be the queen of your world, comment, “Here I am.” Also, consider liking my Facebook Page and subscribing to this blog so you receive updates when I publish the next blog post (top right corner of this blog).